Growing up in a small town in the south, you never really think about different aspects of spirituality.  You are taught that there is one God, one heaven and one hell and if you don’t believe or if you aren’t “saved” in a church then you will be going to hell to burn for all eternity. That never sat right within me. Even as a small child I just couldn’t seem to wrap my head around the fact that even though I was a good person, if I happened to die then I would be burning for all eternity because I didn’t have a man pray over me in front of the church. I wondered how our Father could let that happen and I never believed it. Then my mom decided to join an organization or group or religion called “Jehovah’s Witness”s” and they thought there was gonna be no heaven at all but a new earth that only the “Witness’s” were going to live on. Wow. That didn’t last long and finally she started studying Buddism. Out of all, Buddism made the most sense to me even tho we weren’t able to read that much about it due to it being the 90s and cell phones and the internet hadn’t hit yet.

Anyway, fast forward, life happened, everything went wrong, my parents divorced and the family fell apart and I found myself consumed by drugs and escape tactics and became extremely depressed and life became more about survival than living and it definitely was not enjoyable. Then when I was 23 I had my son, at 27.5 My mom committed suicide and at 28 my brother also committed suicide! What was happening here? Suddenly I was all alone, addicted to pain killers and trying to be a mother to 3 children. My relationship was in shambles, I was angry and hurt and wondering why all this was happening to me??? In 2017 during one of the darkest times of my life I met my soulmate (I thought) my knight in shining armor, and we fell in love. Love at first sight type of love and he saved me from the darkness and myself. I thought I had finally found happiness and true love to stay by my side for the rest of my life. We were happy, in love and was planning to get married. He helped me get past the death of my mom and brother and I helped him get past his mom’s death which occured around the same time as my mom’s. All was well until January 25th 2020. We had relapsed a little and had gotten ahold of some fake product and we overdosed on fentynal laced heroin and the sweetest man I’ve ever known, my heart, my soul mate, lost his life. He lost his precious life and I was left barely breathing, fighting for mine. My world crumbled around me. I call it my “Tower” moment.

After that I wouldn’t walk for 5 months. My fiancees entire family turned on me and once again, I was alone, and angry, and hurt. Surviving this would not be easy and would change my life forever.

Had I not been watching music videos on YouTube feeling sorry for myself then I don’t know if I would’ve even started messing with Tarot, and I don’t know if I’d even be alive to tell this story today. Tarot cards saved my life. They got me on the path I was meant to travel. They comforted me and helped me find myself and a reason for all of my “bad luck”. It wasn’t bad luck at all, it was fate. The planets shifting and Saturn returning was part of my family dieing at 28. My numerology was the reason for alot also. Tho it hurt, it was all part of a bigger plan. Now I’m sober and I just want to help as many as I can. You are not alone. Bad things happen to alot of us, I’m still learning new stuff every day and I feel so excited and youthful from it! This truly is some amazing stuff for me and my Gemin moon, and soul urge and expression number 7 live for this kind of stuff. My birthday day number 8 was just built for hardships and challenge ard hard times. My life path 5 wants chaos, change, freedom and to lose half of what we have. My numbers are pretty bad and I have been through so much crap but right now I am content and I’m learning to love my life. Let me help you discover the light in your darkness. If I can do it then anyone can. Reach out to me, please. Let me help you. I don’t have a PhD and I don’t know everything but I do know how to listen and I’m pretty gifted with the Tarot. I just hate to think that there is someone out there suffering in silence and feeling as alone as I did. Sometimes it just helps to talk and vent and to hear someone say “You are not crazy”. I didn’t have that friend but I can be one to you.